I've often heard managers say - "My door is always open,
come and talk to me anytime."
You have to accept the fact that your team won't always do
that. They might not want to bother you or they may feel
that they should know the answers to their questions and
they'll look stupid if they ask. And how many times have
they approached you and you've been on the phone or "too
busy?"
It's your job to get out and talk to them.

I've also heard managers say - "I sit with my team in an
open-plan office so I'm always available to them and I hear
what's going on" - OH NO YOU DON'T!

It's important to get out of your office or up off your seat
and mix with your people on a regular basis, don't wait for
them to come to you. Pull up a chair and have chat and don't
just talk about business, find out how they're doing on a
human level. That doesn't mean prying into their personal
life, but your team members want to feel that you're
interested and care about them as a person.

It's also important that they feel free to chat amongst
themselves so don't stifle that. A team who have good
relationships with each other are a productive team.

Many business owners and managers aren't comfortable about
speaking to their team members unless it's about business.
I've worked for many managers who knew nothing or very
little about me on a personal basis.

One of my colleagues once told me that our manager had asked
him if I was gay. He'd come to this conclusion because there
didn't seem to be a woman in my life. At the time he was
coming to this conclusion, I was going through the break up
of my fifteen year marriage to my wife. However my manager
didn't know that nor would he have been able to handle it if
he did. That doesn't suggest he was a bad person, he just
didn't know how to make that human connection and sadly he
didn't try.

Perhaps you're not comfortable speaking to your team on a
human level, however, I would ask that you consider the
importance of your communication and rapport building
skills. Your success as a manager is highly dependent on
your ability to listen and speak with your people.

Human beings crave attention and acceptance and they want to
know you care. If your customers and your team members feel
that you're interested and care about them as individuals,
then it becomes so much easier for you to achieve your
goals.

Successful entrepreneurs are excellent at building rapport.
When you meet them they don't necessarily talk about
themselves, they ask you questions. I've met several
successful business people and I'm always impressed and
flattered by their interest in me.

You can practise your rapport building skills any time,
particularly in your personal life. In the locker room at my
local health club, I notice that many of the guys don't
speak to each other. I always make a point of saying hello
or passing the time of day. If they don't want to talk then
that's fine. However, I find they usually do and I've had
some interesting conversations.

And forget what your mother said about never speaking to
strangers - always speak to strangers!

Speak to everyone you meet and practise your rapport
building skills - taxi drivers, people in trains, aeroplanes
and anywhere else you come into contact. I sometimes have to
push myself to do it but I'm always glad when I do.

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